Come Fly with Me ...or just stay home

I have the worst luck with flying.  Probably not the worst, but definitely the top of the list of the people I know.  I also travel a bit more than most of the people I know, so maybe because I travel more I'm more likely to have travel "issues."  I'm not talking "Up in the Air" type, but once every two months are so.  And 9 out of 10 of those times, I have some sort of story.  Or a few...  Either way, after a trip this weekend, it got me thinking about traveling...

1) It's rude to lean your seat back if someone is seated behind you.  They should disable that feature.
2) It's ruder if you're not actually sleeping; if you're just reading, watching a movie on your iPad, etc.
3) It's rude to brag about your iPad, Kindle, etc. and how many books, games, etc. you have.
4) It's rude to talk loudly the ENTIRE flight.
5) An adult scared of flying is 10 times worse than a crying baby.
6) When you kick my seat for the 15th time, I'm going to turn around and give you a dirty look.  It's going to happen.
7) If you are on a flight that has assigned seats, it's not a race to get on the plane when they call your group number.  Your seat will still be there when you get on the plane.  Promise.
8) Seat assignments should be organized by who has the shortest amount of time and/or longest distance to travel to reach their connecting flight.  It would save a lot of people running through the airport.
9) What's the point in traveling 1st class for an hour flight?  I'm going to judge you as I walk back to coach.
10) It's polite to stand a bit back from baggage claim.  I'm not purposely a foot away waiting until my bag goes around 5 times to pick it up.  When you get in front of me, I can no longer see my bag coming.
11) We should all make a promise not to judge how each other's sleep behaviors on planes.  This includes, but is not limited to: open mouths, drool, talking, and a surprise wake up when you had a dream you were falling.
12) Is bloody mary mix and ginger ale the official drinks of the air?  I feel that's what everyone gets.  What did I miss?
13) Are magazines and gum more expensive at the airport?  I don't think I've ever paid $10 at Target...  but maybe it's because I've never bought only gum and magazines at Target.
14) Something other than overhead containers should be created to store carry-ons.  It's what's slowing the whole process down.
15) If it's too heavy for you to lift it over your own head, you should check it at the gate.  It's painful watching you struggle.
16) I think some pilots hit the breaks extra hard on the landings to punish the people that took their seat belts off early.
17) If you do not make a disclaimer to those around you about a quick connecting flight, you need to wait your turn to exit the plane.  Row by row.  Women, children, and the elderly first.  Just like the Titanic.  Except we've landed on solid ground.  We all want off too.
18) Unless you're flying Southwest, there's no point in lining up at the gate.  You end up blocking the aisle.  Then the rest of us almost get hit by the oversized golf carts for transporting the elderly.  I get wanting to stand up, but that's what the walls are for.  Stand by them.
19) The security process has changed since 1982.  Read up on them.  They are for our safety, not our inconvenience.   Be nice to the TSA workers.  They are on our side.
20) Thank a military person for their service.  Help a woman alone with her children.  Answer an elderly person's ridiculous questions about travel.  Smile instead of sighing at the crying baby.  Say "hello" when you sit down next to a stranger, but watch the small talk...

Those are just a few of my thoughts about flying.  I'm sure there's more.  So "come fly with me" ... or just stay home!